Have you ever thought about your clients or customers as “patients?”
And if you haven’t, what kind of bedside manor could you add when you deal with them…in addition to selling to them and servicing them?
One way is to onboard them forever as I talked about in “Onboarding is not housekeeping.”
Another way is to be more patient with your patients.
When emailing your online family (i.e., your list), if someone writes to you with an outrageous excuse for not doing something you’ve recommended…or is stubborn with their position when you know they are off base…or they even begin to troll you…how patient should you be with that particular “patient?”
We had this discussion on a Titans Xcelerator call a couple of years ago with Ben Settle, the king of email marketing, (which included his diabolical trolling practices) and is known ostensibly for having less patience…but when you dive deeper into his philosophy, it’s less patience with a purpose.
I was reminded of Ben’s thinking today—on “Black Friday”–the day after Thanksgiving (which is the polar opposite of Thanksgiving, where we pledge gratitude to everyone in our lives).
“Black Friday” on the other hand, involves a different pledge…one that involves abandoning universal gratitude and replacing it with a commitment to trample everyone within a 3 foot radius trying to get the best deal on an 85 inch TV.
Yikes!
Ben establishes a baseline that if someone on his list (which is truly his online family…they are feverish in their loyalty to Ben) is obnoxious, rude, or can’t disagree without being disagreeable, he not only writes that person out of his will (i.e., removes them from his family) …but he uses them as an example of “what not to do” when one is at a “family gathering” online.
His goal: To have his family be like minded in their general philosophy about direct response marketing without being sycophants…all the while encouraging disagreements, conversation and lively banter that leads to education, lessons, and wisdom.
Kind of like sitting around the Thanksgiving table with opinionated relatives…sometimes.
And goal #2 for Ben is to have a group that is one with him until they aren’t… that is, encouraging conflict while coming back together when the conflict is complete.
You just need to be polite no matter what your beef is with him.
Be on the lookout for misery and email lashings if you cross that red line with him, however.
While I have a different style with my online family, I endorse Ben’s because it is congruent with everything he does…he never wavers…because I know underneath it all, he is a pussycat.
When I told him I loved him during our call (in conjunction with loving my online family), he replied, “I’m fond of you too, Brian.”
I’ll take that as “I love you” in Benspeak. 🙂
When I receive what I call a “misplaced response” to one of my emails or blog posts…whether it is rude or just ignorant, my first reaction, which I mumble under my breath, is:
“Assh*le…Assh*le…Assh*le”
Then I get my composure and determine if this person “deserves” a teaching moment.
Not to make them wrong or to prove my superiority…but to give them a perspective from a soldier who has been in the trenches of marketing warfare over four decades.
As the man who saved the world during WWII, Winston Churchill, said:
“Nothing in life is so exhilarating as to be shot at without result.”
And since I’m still here, I resemble that quote.
Don’t get me wrong…if I receive an email that is beyond repair (i.e., it is a rant with no direction or purpose), I immediately disown that person from my estate (i.e. I delete them from the family) and go on to the next.
Chances are those kinds of folks are not going to respond, engage…much less buy anything in the future from me…with “buying” being a distant third (and not a requirement) to be part of my online family.
More times than not, I can’t help myself being grandpa at the picnic…not to tell the kids to pipe down or give them a “back in my day” lecture…but rather to comment on a flippant response that has no truth and has been thought about for less than 15 minutes and needs lots of clarification.
In my opinion, of course.
And I’m still figuring stuff out every day so I’m not saying I’m always right.
Well, in the examples I’m thinking about, I am always right. 🙂
Here’s one I get often:
“That’s interesting but it doesn’t apply to MY business.”
Combating this one is difficult with someone with limited business experience…but when I heard it applied to Breakthrough Advertising, Gene Schwartz’s 1966 masterpiece which is as relevant today as when it was written, I couldn’t let that stand.
A buyer wrote to me asking for a refund after he bought the book with the following reason for returning it:
“The book just doesn’t seem to be as applicable to my industry…I am a real estate investor, who markets directly to home sellers, to purchase their property.
Hmmm. Aren’t home sellers “consumers?”
And isn’t Breakthrough Advertising a book about consumer behavior as much as it is about copywriting and marketing?
I felt this was a teaching moment…not just about Breakthrough Advertising, but also about dismissing core concepts of direct response too quickly and missing out on gems from others.
My reply:
The book is very applicable to your industry…as it is to every industry…and I am not just saying that because I sell it.
Are all the “home sellers” in your market homogeneous?
That is, do they all have the same reason for selling (i.e., their desire)?
Do they all have the same level of sophistication?
Do they all have the same awareness of the marketplace…or you personally?
Those are just a few of the things Breakthrough Advertising brings to light…and would make your messaging stand out depending on who you are talking to (or mailing, emailing, on Facebook…whatever).
And we also sell Breakthrough Advertising Mastery which is a way to apply the principles to any business…yes, even real estate investors.
Having shared this with you, I can now sleep tonight. 🙂
You should be careful dismissing something that has a proven track record based on “it doesn’t apply to me” …there are things hidden in plain sight worth exploring…always.
You aren’t the first to claim this.
In fact, I’ve heard this from hundreds of people over the years, rarely about Breakthrough Advertising mind you…and you won’t be the last.
When we host hot seats inside my Titans Xcelerator Mastermind, I always preface them with (at a minimum) these three key concepts:
1) If you’re on the hot seat, no “yeah buts” or “I did that and it didn’t work.” You’ve got the rest of your life to dismiss any idea…why do it in the moment it is brought up? Take everything in…sit with it…and dismiss it later if you like.
2) If you are in the audience, think about how the hot seat applies to you no matter how different the subject seems to be (while helping the person on the hot seat). Every problem is an opportunity and can be reengineered for any business.
3) You are always one sentence, one comment, one spark from someone else in conversation, a quote in a book or someone presenting on stage from changing your business…even your life. Keep your ears open and look for solutions rather than excuses.
I wish you only the best in all your future endeavors.
When the book is returned, we will issue you a full refund.
I’m sorry it didn’t meet your expectations.
I must admit, this was an easy one…and while it didn’t save the sale, it saved my sense of truth, justice and the American way (i.e. in terms of marketing and business problem solving).
I have many more emails like this where I educate someone without their permission…and so far, this has served me well…and it has nothing to do with making a sale.
I want to “troll with a purpose” (like Ben) doing it in a way that is consistent with my philosophy and style.
Ironically, the next email in my Inbox after the one above was easier to deal with…from a (soon to be removed) member of my online family:
“F*ck you. You talk like you know something and you don’t. You’re a dinosaur.”
I loved this one as well…especially because my email address is “T Rex” …and I am not extinct (yet).
It takes a village (with some idiots) … and this person will sadly miss out on all my future lessons from the Jurassic Period.
Somehow, I don’t think he will lose any sleep over it.
Nor will I.
Warmly,
Brian
P.S. I hosted 40 marketing and copywriting superstars from my Titans Xcelerator Mastermind (live and in person) on November 19th.
No trolls were invited…or attended.
Note that Titans Xcelerator was launched 100% on Zoom in December of 2019 (which is pre-COVID by three months…which proves I predicted the pandemic).
I’m not proud of that…but it’s part of my C.V. regardless. 🙂
This live event included 3 glorious hours of masterminding…followed by an “Intentional Dinner” …which you can read about in my book, Overdeliver (pages 217-225) which makes a compelling case that if you’re going to eat, why not make it a meal worth remembering (beyond the food)?
Dinner was on me (as a thank you to my members) …part of the “overdelivery” of being a member…which includes free access to everything I do (e.g. Breakthrough Advertising Bootcamp, other webinars and training, 30+ live calls per year)…plus half price on everything I sell (books, workbooks, classic swipe files) for members only.
I encourage you to join the family.
Three more intentional, in-person dinners are on the horizon in 2026…in Scottsdale, Arizona…Tampa, Florida…and Greenwich, Connecticut.
Turning a virtual mastermind into an IRL (“in real life”) mastermind is confirmation that when confronted with wearing pants, members will rise to the occasion…and they will show up and play full out, helping everyone in the room get smarter…and better at everything they do.
After hosting Titans Mastermind for 8 years, (which included 3 live events a year), this “Titans Xcelerator Live” mastermind and dinner brought me back to my roots…and I realized how much I missed it.
No need to miss it anymore.
Click here to read about how you can make joining this amazing family happen…both virtually and IRL…with 30 live calls per year that are rooms/screens where everyone just gets smarter…and occasional live events and dinners.
For as little as $200 per month.
Here is a peek into the room where the most recent Titans IRL event happened…we had a blast…giving and connecting with each other…with everyone properly attired (photo courtesy of Vance Morris, a member of Titans Mastermind and now Titans Xcelerator):
