Now…if only I practiced what I preached in this subject line (open loop)…
This post is about humility…which is #6 of the “7 Things that must be present to become a world class copywriter (and marketer)”
The fact that it’s #6 of 7 doesn’t diminish its importance…it’s just not as sexy to talk about.
Things like hunger, passion, and insatiable curiosity come before humility on my list (which is based on my 45 years in the trenches of direct response marketing) to get your attention…but putting humility near the bottom of the list is my way of saving the best for (almost) last.
That is, I maintain that “humility” being #6 of 7 still makes it the most important for long term success and fulfillment…and clearly my prioritization skills and how I write about my priorities need some work.
Consider this post a positive step in that work. 😊
If David Ogilvy can practice humility, we all can.
Ogilvy saying he’s a “lousy copywriter” might be a little too much self-deprecation…but it illustrates a point…and it is a good reminder that it’s OK to brag about our accomplishments while staying humble.
And I will get to a recent example shortly of when self-deprecation tries to imitate humility…with negative impact.
But let’s go deeper on humility breeding success first.
I’ve told a story before on a podcast about the copywriter who contacted me while I was still working at Boardroom (where we only hired the best-of-the-best).
He wrote:
“I am very interested in writing for you…and I know that I will be the best writer you have ever hired and the most successful that has ever walked through the doors at Boardroom.”
The fact that I had never heard of him before did not eliminate him from contention although his claim was a bit hyperbolic.
Instead of dismissing him solely based on his supreme confidence (coupled with a total lack of humility), I decided to see if there was any truth in his claim.
I did some digging and found his website and some writing samples…and frankly, he wasn’t very talented (and I am being kind).
It made me wonder if this guy had done any research on the history of Boardroom and knew that we had worked with some of the greatest copywriters of all time (and I am not saying that to brag…just stating a fact).
I checked him out further in case I missed something…and in this case I did not.
I’m using this somewhat ridiculous example to help us all reflect on how we present ourselves in the marketplace—and while this is an extreme case of someone possibly living on a different planet (or at least in a different state of reality), I urge you to take a look at how you present yourself to others who you might work with or work for…what you take credit for…and what you don’t take credit for.
And I also urge you to do some research before making claims you can’t back up.
How did I respond to this copywriter?
While I didn’t want to be cruel, I couldn’t resist using a little sarcasm to possibly teach him something:
Thanks for your interest in writing for Boardroom.
When I read your email the first thing I thought was “shame on me!” since I have been working in direct marketing for over 30 years, worked with some of the best of the best copywriters who have ever lived—which I consider a privilege—and I have never heard of you before.
After looking at your samples, I don’t think you are a great fit for us right now…even though I am sure you are talented and have had some success.
And I wish you even more success in the future.
I didn’t bother dropping names or letting him know that he was clearly not the best writer who would have ever worked for us had I hired him (supreme understatement) …and interestingly he never responded.
He either got the message or maybe it was just a form letter.
Or maybe he simply wanted to get my attention so I could write a blog about him someday. 🙂
But I ask you…are you presenting yourself with “confident humility?”
Without a whiff of anything that smells like arrogance?
Or full of brags you can’t back up?
A friend of mine just shared with me some examples of copywriters and marketers who have “misrepresented” their accomplishments to her (and others) when being interviewed for assignments.
That is, they took credit for much more than they did for previous clients…and of course different levels of incompetence showed up once they were hired.
None of us does anything 100% on our own…even just starting with, “I did this amazing launch/package/promotion with a TEAM that produced incredible results” is much better than making it seem like you did it all yourself.
At least this leaves some room for “learning on the new job” while bringing your best experience and skills to it, based on your past success.
In short, I despise arrogance and hubris (and you should too).
Strive for humility while being self-confident at the same time…brag about what you did…and be clear about what you might not be an expert at and never claim you can do something that might be done better by others.
As a writer OR marketer, I believe this is a good place to originate– always check your ego at the door while still bringing your knowledge and wisdom to every encounter.
Confidence in talking about your accomplishments is not arrogance if expressed properly and with grace…but still conveyed powerfully.
Another way to put it:
Grace and humility trumps all.
On the other end of the spectrum…closer to David Ogilvy being a lousy copywriter…is this story from the Titans of Direct Response event in 2014 and my experience asking some of the greatest figures in the world of direct marketing to speak at the event.
Many people asked me:
“How did you get all of them to speak and how did you deal with all of those swelled heads?”
Well…first of all…I chose wisely. I only asked those who were a fit.
Why ask someone to speak at this landmark event who didn’t encompass the values of my mentor, Marty Edelston, who the event was a tribute to…and by osmosis, my values too?
At the top of the list was choosing speakers who “serve” rather than “sell.”
With confident humility.
Which enables them to sell more than most.
And I can tell you now that it was easy (for the most part) because grace and humility are part of their makeup, much more than them reminding me how great they are and how lucky I was to get them to speak.
Two of the speakers come to mind right away:
Gary Bencivenga (the best copywriter in the world alive today with more “unbeatable controls” than anyone in history); and Greg Renker (the top infomercial producer EVER and the man who ran a $2 billion company at the time).
I encourage all of you whenever you think about bragging about yourself or being envious of the success of others around you (or the accomplishments of anyone in your life), go to gratefulness over envy…and thank your lucky stars for everything you have in your life when you have the opportunity to interact with greatness all around you.
Simply put, if you could have been on any of the preparation calls I had with Gary or Greg before “Titans”…or been on any of the follow up calls or emails after the event…what you would have heard and seen from these two giants (and the other speakers too) was 100% grace and humility…and THEIR gratitude for being part of such an amazing tribute to someone who they had utmost respect (i.e. Marty).
Regarding Gary, he had already retired from public speaking at the time of the event…but he wanted to come out one more time to honor all of his “competitors” (in addition to Marty)–who he usually beat when he went against them but he revered them at the same time–because it was them who made him the copywriting legend he became by setting the bar so high.
When you go against the best…and beat the best…never rest on your laurels…and treat those you beat like royalty.
That’s a definition of humility we can all get behind.
Regarding Greg Renker, I even told this story from the stage at “Titans” about the call I received from Greg’s assistant months before the event asking, “Where should Greg send his $5,000 registration fee?”
Of course I said, “Are you kidding?” (but I was thinking, WTF?) 🙂
Greg’s assistant: “Well, Greg just wants to contribute something.”
I thought I was in some bizarro world…but it was a valuable lesson:
Even someone like Greg Renker takes nothing for granted and plays the game with confident humility all the time.
And what he contributed at the event was priceless…which is more than $5,000 for those of you doing the math.
But this applies in all aspects of our lives—from “famous people” (in our industry or in a wider sphere) … to folks we encounter every day.
A friend of mine was recently diagnosed with advanced heart disease, diagnosed by his local cardiologist, who was highly credentialed with a solid reputation and booming practice.
None of his degrees were in humility…but fortunately for my friend, he had done the work in that area just the same.
When confronted with my friend’s complicated and unique case, one that required much more knowledge, guidance and care than he thought he could give…instead of faking it until making it…he referred my friend to someone with superior training and skills given the complexities of this case being “above his pay grade.”
But how often does this happen?
Especially with professionals who read their press clippings which don’t always correspond to their competency.
Hopefully this kind of thing–where the best defer to even better than best– happens more than I think.
Unfortunately, I hear all too often whether in medicine, law… and yes, marketing…that arrogance and ego take precedence…and the doctor, lawyer and marketing consultant get in way over their head with disastrous results.
I guess stubbornness and trying to prove something enters in here too, both of which are not part of the “humility equation.”
What did my friend do?
He thanked his cardiologist for checking his ego at the door (I love that phrase…obviously)…for getting him the advanced care he needed rather than muddling through his case while admiring the diplomas on his wall…and he is now being cared for with the expertise needed to make his quality of life as good as it can be.
It’s another take on ultimate humility in action.
People who are confident but never arrogant in their abilities make the best people to interact with, work with…and dare I say, trust our lives with.
I don’t know about you, but I find this refreshing…and in this example, life (expectancy) changing. 😊
One last aspect about humility and making it a clear distinction from self-deprecation.
I’ve had my head handed to me on this one numerous times…thank goodness for my friends who tell me when I fall into this misdirected “humility trap.”
Most recently, I was speaking at a high-level mastermind—talking a mile a minute (like I always do) and repeatedly asking for grace from the audience for being “a tangent waiting to happen.”
And that my brain was scrambled.
And that I talk too fast.
And admitting that I am not making sense without asking if I am.
I’m sure you’ve all been there.
But is that humility?
No.
It’s an excuse, with overcompensation, and an occasional putdown for being who I am.
In the words of Google AI:
Self-deprecating means belittling or undervaluing oneself, often through excessive modesty or humor. People frequently use this trait to appear humble, agreeable, or down-to-earth, though excessive use can sometimes reflect or reinforce lower self-esteem
This practice is clearly counterproductive (in addition to being ineffective) since you lose your audience through self-deprecation.
Worst case: “Why should they listen to me?” …while you are trying to be a humble servant who has wisdom to share.
Talk about losing the plot. ☹
Thankfully it was brought to my attention by a long-time results leader and dear friend who was in the audience.
His advice: Get off it.
And he went on:
You are not serving your audience (us) by making fun of yourself, putting yourself down, making excuses for your “behavior” …when there’s nothing wrong or to make excuses for.
What a lesson…and contribution…with love never leaving the room when he delivered it.
And lo and behold, he did it with humility. 😊
Warmly,
Brian
P.S. I have a humble offer for you today…one that is exclusive to my online family (you)…and one that has been a long time coming.
As you may know, I’ve got a virtual mastermind that is going strong—Titans Xcelerator—with close to 250 members who are best-in-class direct response marketers, copywriters and “marketing entrepreneurs.”
And while Zoom is great, in-person is better.
With each discussion about AI within the group, we always circle back to what it means to be human…and one thing that is clear is that meeting face-to-face (with pants on!) beats Zoom every time.
I love Zoom…but there comes a time to go human-to-human.
That’s why I am hosting my first live event since I concluded my Titans Mastermind in 2023 after eight glorious years of transformational events…and this one will be equally epic.
And while it is being billed as “Titans Xcelerator Live,” you can still come even if you are not a member.
Interested?
Note: Your registration for the event includes a one-year membership to Titans Xcelerator…so you come to the event for the information…stay for two days of mind-expanding contributions and connections while rubbing shoulders (literally) with the best-of-the-best…and then you automatically become a member of a very special family…with 12 months of inspiration…and beyond.
It will be a party…that will never end. 🙂
Already confirmed as guest speakers:
- Three world class, legendary copywriters, responsible for over a billion impressions (conservatively)
- One of the most effective and results-driven online marketers and coaches in the world
- The most sought-after expert in “experience marketing”
And I’m just getting started.
And feel free to email me.
Hope to see you in the flesh (but not in the nude!) in October.
Warning: You won’t be able to turn your camera off either. 😊