In the last chapter of my book Overdeliver, which is titled Playing the Long Game, I begin with a quote from my mentor Marty Edelston:
“Life is Long.”
I’ve used that quote throughout my career (and in these posts in the past)—and whenever someone says “Life is Short.”
I also use it—and you can too–whenever you give up more in a negotiation than you might have wanted to; or when you don’t get everything you want in a business or personal transaction (but you know you did the right thing).
“Forgiveness is giving up the hope that one day you’ll have a better past”
And since life is long, looking at the present (and into the future) is far more useful than lamenting about your decisions (and possible mistakes) of the past.
That “forgiveness” quote above came from Joe Polish, my friend of almost 25 years, a “results leader” (more on that below) during a fireside chat we had at the Titans Master Class meeting in Arizona last month.
It was one of many gems from a man who has played the long game for as long as I have known him.
And he’s still playing it today.
A little more about “hoping for a better past” before I share some other highlights from my discussion with Joe.
What should you take from your past?
Joe and I follow entrepreneur coach Dan Sullivan’s advice that you shouldn’t ignore your past…just decide what to take from your past into your future…and what to disregard as noise, not useful or dare I say, garbage.
Usually that means what goes with you to the future are the lessons you’ve learned, the skills you’ve attained and the friends you’ve made along the way—and the rest is happily and freely left behind.
Dan also has a corollary about money and how it relates to your past and future:
Money lost or money left on the table is about the past; your resources, contacts, and cumulative education can never be taken from you…and those are your prized possessions that you take into the future.
And I guess if there’s money there, that’s OK too. 🙂
Here is an example of something I discarded from my past (the term “networking”) butretained a “flavor” of it (and this is also from the last chapter of Overdeliver):
I guess networking and making valuable connections is one of my own superpowers—but I still hate the term. My distaste for the word (and the idea behind it) stems from my late 20s, when I was featured in a trade magazine in one of those “30 under 30” profile pieces which on the one hand, I was very proud of, though on the other hand, I was a bit embarrassed. The profile dubbed me a “strategic schmoozer,” which to me implied that I was more fluff than substance . . . or that I had some secret agenda when I met people or added them to my network. Because of that article, I was concerned that people might perceive me as disingenuous. I believe it is the reason why I am so uninterested in superficial networking today—and why my take on this important area has evolved into something much more.
The flavor of networking I’m obsessed with is “contributing to connect.”
I took “contributing to connect” with me from my past and into my future and turned it into a strength–and left behind “strategic schmoozer,” networking…and fluff.
And that brings me back to Joe Polish.
Joe and I got into this discussion in depth (and many more) during our session in Phoenix–because he is all about contributing to connect (and not simply networking) as well.
I’ve often called myself the “poor man’s Joe Polish.” And I am proud of that. 🙂
For our “fireside chat,” we even had a makeshift fireplace…the fire was projected on a screen behind us—which was far more comfortable since it was 80 degrees outside.
Diversion: It reminded me of “the Yule Log show” during Christmas Eve in decades past–when certain TV stations didn’t want to waste time showing reruns of I Dream of Jeannie and preferred to show a burning log while playing Christmas songs.
I’m sure many of you have no idea what I am talking about…but thanks for amusing me.
All you need to know is that the fireside chat with Joe was one of the high points of the event…and here are some other things we discussed while “cooling ourselves by the fire”…
Learn who is a contributor and who is a taker
This is critical if you are going to be helpful to people rather than always trying to get the better end of the deal.
Contribute first and don’t ask for things when there is no relationship or trust built into the relationship yet…what I call “the ask out of nowhere.”
Thought leaders vs result leaders
According to Joe, any moron can have a thought; not everyone gets results.
I will stop using the term “thought leader” from now on because of this discussion.
We should describe the key mentors in our lives as “result leaders.”
I like the idea of being a “result leader” too…it excites me…and it’s what I am going to make Titans Xcelerator all about. Get results for members no matter how small or how large.
Simply put, Joe is a results leader…and I want to be like him when I grow up. 🙂
You can’t punish the pain out of people
Or…Don’t take away the gift of someone’s struggles.
Joe explained in detail how his struggles—a true hero’s journey—were all part of what got him to where he is today.
He went from a dead broke carpet cleaner to the leader of the most dynamic group of genius entrepreneurs in the world (Genius Network).
He told his story to Titans Master Class in more detail than there is room to tell here– and there were some powerful lessons for all of us.
(See the P.S. to find out how you can get a video of our entire Fireside Chat).
And he is now on a mission to rid the world of addiction with his non-profit, Genius Recovery.
According to Joe:
“The hardest people to get into recovery are smart people. They think they can out think it as opposed to surrendering.”
You’re the million dollar racehorse–what are you doing to take care of that asset?
If you owned a horse that was worth millions of dollars to you because it won almost every time you raced it, you would make sure it ate only the best food, that it got adequate sleep every night, and you would certainly exercise it regularly.
Why do entrepreneurs abuse their bodies (and their lives) by working all the time and not protecting their key asset (i.e. themselves)?
You’ve heard this before but just in case, here’s a reminder:
A person who has their health, has a thousand dreams; but the person that has lost their health, has only one dream.
Success is contagious
Who do you hang around with on a regular basis?
People who lift you up and are successful?
Or people who bring you down and tend to complain rather than do something about their situation?
I choose the former…that’s why I belong to six mastermind groups and run three—success is contagious and you can never stop learning.
And you can never be the smartest person in the room either.
This was on the back of the t-shirts we had made up for Titans Master Class:
These topics were just the tip of the iceberg during my hour and a half “Yule Log Chat” with Joe Polish.
I even learned some new things about him even though we have a history together that spans almost a quarter of a century.
As soon as we finished, I decided I would make the video available as the first monthly video in Titans Xcelerator. See the P.S.
That is, after you absorb Dan Kennedy’s killer presentation (which is the video in the welcome package).
I will also be sharing a lot more from this meeting in Arizona with you over the next weeks and months.
All in the spirit of becoming a results leader like my buddy Joe.
P.S. If you would like the full hour and a half with me and Joe—along with 13 more exceptional pieces of content and 24 calls over the next year (plus a giving and generous community and much more)—please join Titans Xcelerator today.
There will never be a better time.
If you are unaware of this program, it is a virtual mastermind group…using the teachings and some of the format of my more expensive live mastermind groups…that I know will change your business.
On January 9th we are launching this very special program–and you can be a charter member at a price only available until the end of the year, never to be offered again.
And you can lock into this price for as long as you stay in the group.
But the price isn’t the most important thing about this offer.
Announcing Titans Xcelerator:
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Titans Xcelerator is the perfect way for you to get my direct input (and the input of so many other heroes and geniuses)—specifically, my heroes and geniuses who I trust more than anyone for my own mentorship and education.
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